Navigating the Storm: How to Deal With A Stubborn Autistic Child

Understanding the Causes of Difficult Behavior in Children with Autism

Before attempting to manage difficult behavior, it’s crucial to understand the underlying reasons behind it. Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) affects children in unique ways, leading to various behaviors such as aggression, meltdowns, noncompliance, and repetitive actions. 

ASD behaviors can stem from several factors:

Sensory Overload

Children with autism often experience sensory sensitivities, which can lead to sensory overload. Bright lights, loud noises, or crowded spaces can overwhelm them, resulting in outbursts or withdrawal. Identifying sensory triggers and creating a more sensory-friendly environment can help reduce these occurrences.

Communication Challenges

Many children with autism struggle with verbal communication and may have limited language skills. This can lead to frustration when they are unable to express their needs or desires, leading to challenging behaviors. Non-verbal cues, such as pointing or using visual aids, can assist in reducing frustration and improving communication.

Difficulty with Transitions

Children with autism often prefer routines and may become upset when faced with changes. A sudden transition between activities, environments, or expectations can trigger anxiety and result in difficult behaviors. Preparing children for transitions and providing structure can help them cope with these changes more effectively.

Unmet Needs or Wants

Like all children, children with autism may act out when they need something or are denied a request. Whether it’s food, attention, or a preferred activity, unmet needs can lead to challenging behaviors. Understanding the child’s needs and responding appropriately can prevent frustration and tantrums.

Emotional Regulation Issues

Children with autism may struggle with emotional regulation, making it difficult for them to cope with stress or disappointment. As a result, they may display behaviors such as aggression, crying, or self-injury when they feel overwhelmed. Teaching emotional regulation skills through strategies like mindfulness or calming techniques can help children better manage their emotions.

Proven Strategies to Manage Difficult Behavior in Children with Autism

Use Positive Reinforcement

Positive reinforcement is one of the most effective strategies for promoting desirable behaviors in children with autism. By rewarding appropriate behaviors with praise, stickers, or small treats, children are more likely to repeat those behaviors in the future. Consistency in reinforcement is key to success.

Example:

• Behavior: A child uses words to ask for help.
• Reinforcement: Provide immediate praise or a token as a reward.

Implement Visual Supports

Visual supports, such as schedules, charts, or social stories, can help children with autism understand expectations and reduce anxiety. These tools provide structure and predictability, making transitions and daily activities easier to navigate.

Example:

• A visual schedule with pictures for each step of the morning routine can help a child understand what comes next and prepare for transitions.

Create a Sensory-Friendly Environment

Given the sensory sensitivities of many children with autism, modifying the environment can help prevent sensory overload and reduce difficult behaviors. This might include dimming lights, reducing noise levels, or offering sensory breaks throughout the day.

Example:

• Create a quiet corner with soft lighting, noise-canceling headphones, and fidget toys where the child can retreat when feeling overwhelmed.

Teach Emotional Regulation Skills

Teaching children with autism how to identify and manage their emotions can prevent meltdowns and aggression.

Techniques such as deep breathing, counting, or using a “calm-down” space can be beneficial. Role-playing and modeling emotional regulation can also be effective tools.

Example:

• Technique: Teach the child to count to ten slowly when they begin to feel frustrated, allowing time for their emotions to settle.

Use Clear and Consistent Communication

Children with autism often respond better to clear, direct communication. Using simple, concise language and visual cues can help ensure that the child understands expectations and instructions. Non-verbal communication, such as gestures or sign language, may also be beneficial.

Example:

• Instead of saying, “Please put your toys away,” you could use a visual aid that shows the action or a hand gesture.

Prepare for Transitions

Since transitions can be challenging, it’s important to prepare children with autism in advance. Give them a warning before a change in activity, and provide a visual or verbal cue for what’s coming next. This reduces anxiety and helps the child adjust to the transition more smoothly.

Example:

• “In five minutes, we will clean up and get ready for lunch” or use a timer to signal the end of one activity and the beginning of another.

Develop a Behavior Plan

A behavior plan is an individualized strategy that outlines specific goals and techniques to address challenging behaviors. Behavior plans should include preventive strategies, specific interventions for difficult behaviors, and clear reinforcement techniques. Collaborating with professionals such as behavior analysts can be helpful in creating an effective plan.

Example:

• If a child displays aggression when frustrated, the behavior plan may include techniques such as offering a sensory break or using positive reinforcement for appropriate behaviors.